Saturday, November 22, 2008

We medical students have had our fair share of chemistry. Organic chemistry, inorganic chemistry, biochemistry... you name it, we’ve been through it. Many had tough times with it while a few lucky ones like myself who have a penchant for it, breezed through it. We all agree on one thing though- reactions are always balanced.

I lay in bed, easing into hubby’s hands, resting my head on his chest, feeling his abundant chest hair (yummy!) tickle my nose. I inhaled deeply his masculine scent- one that both comforts me and drives me wild, tempting me into sin.

You see.. I’ve always had this acute sense of smell- one where I could literally smell someone familiar meters away as if I was some german shepherd. Every smell soon gets itched in. Alot of my memories are either triggered by or have a particular scent or aroma accompanying them. His scent caused a chemical reaction in me.

I ran my fingers through his chest, thinking about everything we’ve been through- about how we met for the first time- how our eyes met and how we kept bumping into each other four times randomly over a period of time.. about how he we finally decided to sit down and talk.. about how he could stand the hyper me.. about how he’d keep me company on the phone till I fell asleep ‘cos I was (and still am) afraid of the dark.. about how we had the incredible urge to kiss and hold each other but never acted on it.. about how we texted each other throughout a movie as we didn’t want to risk being thrown out for being loud.. about how he wept like a baby sometime after our breakup, telling me he loved and couldn’t do well without me.. about how on our first night in bed, he put his own pleasure on hold and said “Take all the time you need before you feel ready to give yourself to me- be it a week, a month or a year”... about how we sat down about how I fought with him and how he’d just stay amazed, smiling as he’d go “You’re beautiful when you’re angry too.”

I could never stay angry with him- after all, I’ve never had a legitimate reason to do so. I mean who was I kidding? Everything just pales away into insignificance. We overcame all these adversities. We had it going for us.. we were what people wanted.. we were what we wanted.. we were what I wanted. His love, compassion and patience caused a chemical reaction in me.

I remembered how my feelings echoed that of Ally McBeals’ a couple of months before: it wasn’t about me wanting a man- was about me wanting a partner.. a partner to go through life with and because I’m heterosexual, it happens to limit the field to men at least if I want to make love and I do. I like making love and if that makes me weak, tough, I want to be weak. I want a partner! I want to make love! I want a house with furniture.. I want to have a baby, I wanna have all of it. I want to get fatter. I want to wear maternity dresses. I want to stick my legs up, get two shots of pitocin and spit the little thing out right between my thighs and then have him suck on my breasts with daddy standing there the whole time playing the camcorder. That is what I wanted. And instead of sitting back, hoping for it to happen, I was going to make it happen.

It was when I stopped trying though, did things actually take off. He came into my life when I was least expecting it. Our personalities catalyzing the reaction as passion heated and speed it up greatly. As shy as he was, he warmed up when he realized his love and desire to get know me outweighed his shyness. I alone didn’t make it happen- we made it happen- our chemistry made it happen. Fast forward and here we are today- in love, together, smelling like each other. It takes two hands to clap. I was inert, yes but not when it came to him- I reacted, I craved and continue to crave him.

My stomach felt queasy- its the damn sickness again.. I felt like throwing up. He instinctively moved his hands over my stomach, rubbing it gently. Warmth enveloped me. I basked in his love. I did feel better. I wondered how he felt what was going on despite being in a deep slumber. If this isn’t chemistry, I don’t know what it is. My soul maginfies his’ and I rejoiced in him. He is the reason for my chemistry.

So what is chemistry might you ask? It is the science of love. It is the alchemy of the soul. It is where one action has its own reaction- one that cannot be forced. It is where that one spark alone gets the fire going, lighting the flames of passion. It is the very essence of life. That’s what chemistry is. That’s what chemistry does. That’s what chemistry feels like- intoxicating, warm, robust and undying.

Chemistry: you either have it or you don’t.

Chinese Comdome-d Hairbands

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

"Necessity is the mother of all inventions" they say. This gives it a whole new meaning. Perhaps the Chinese have taking recycling a bit too far?

More Info:
Ps. No, those aren't my hands!

I'm not sure about you girls out there but I sure don't particularly enjoy getting my hair starched.

About Maya

Thursday, October 16, 2008


A writer, an artist, a social and human rights activist and a citizen of the world. How did a 20-something year old medical student get all mish-mashed? I have no idea. Heck... if I knew, it wouldn’t be a question anymore! Call me the Jill of all trades but I’d much prefer to be known as a Renaissance Woman.

Art, biology, chemistry, history, languages, law, literature, political science, psychology, spirituality.. you name it and I’m interested in it (probably except for cats, hikes, math and physics). I wanted to be a lawyer, a clinical psychologist, a detective and environmentalist once upon a time.

I used to hate getting into politics- discussing them, etc but things changed as I started to witness stupidity and injustice. I’m not a major political-buff but I do enjoy being well-informed- especially when it regards the Middle-East. I spend my free time watching documentaries on Al Jazzy, BBC, CNN and what not. Don’t be fooled though- I enjoy Grey’s Anatomy, Desperate Housewives, Will & Grace and a few other serials too!

I do my best to focus on the positive things in life and am a firm believer in the power of the mind. Thoughts create reality. What you think is what you create. The outer world is merely a symbolic representation of that which is within. Living my life with gratitude is very important to me and I therefore start & end the day with meditation.

All my relationships are blissful and filled with love. Support, compassion, understanding and acceptance are some of the words that resonate with my relationships. I destroy my enemies when I make them my friends.

After I'm done with med school, I hope to do my residency in pediatrics. I love children and hope to build homes for them around the world. They won't be orphans anymore- they have God & me!

Maya Profile

52 Things You Didn’t Know About Me:

1. I’m 1.85m tall without heels.
2. I don’t enjoy scrubbing into surgeries.
3. I’m vegetarian.
4. I’m so hyper, I could bring Jesus down.
5. I have a Bachelors in sweetness, a Masters in seduction and a PhD in sarcasm.
6. I can’t sleep unless I’m under a comforter- even in the summers.
7. I melt at any temperature above 24 deg C.
8. I don’t engage in pre-marital sex.
9. I love ginger candy.
10. I don’t believe in polygamy.
11. I eat orange peel and love it.
12. I prefer soy milk to plain milk. Flavored milk is ok and no, I’m not lactose intolerent.
13. I lived in Singapore for 13 years.
14. My right pinky got dislocated when I was 14 and I didn’t get it popped back.
15. I think effervescent multi-vitamins taste better when they’re eaten.
16. I had the biggest crush on Captain Planet once upon a time.
17. I share the same birthday with my mother- she got married two days before her 19th birthday and gave birth to me on her 20th birthday.
18. Acting & public speaking is in my blood- my mom had her own TV show when she was 17/18 & was a known debater. Daddy is a well-respected public speaker.
19. My mouth never takes a holiday.
20. I abso-freggin-lutely love children.
21. I cannot stand injustice of any form.
22. I’m highly-opinionated.
23. I love spicy food.
24. I love to eat green apples with salt.
25. I love ginger ale- its my favorite drink ever.
26. I’m not a breakfast person. I just can’t eat so early in the morning.
27. The arabic is speak is a mixture of the Lebanese & Kuwaiti dialects.
28. I’m highly intuitive.
29. I know what its like to live alone and I don’t quite enjoy it.
30. I think Dr. Phil needs to see himself.
31. I meditate.
32. I enjoy reading.
33. I love watching serials and documentaries alike. Romantic comedies, medical drama and reenactments, women’s issues and Middle-Eastern documentaries fuel me.
34. I shared lollipops with my brother Bruno, a german shepherd.
35. Bruno was put to sleep because he suffered from severe arthritis, a slip-disc and couldn’t walk.
36. I may come across as someone who’s really strong and determined and may intimidate people but I’m a softie at heart- really sensitive too.
37. I don’t enjoy hiking.
38. My tongue and brain are weirdly-connected. After tasting something, I work backwards & re-create its recipe.
39. I dislike cats despite the fact that a pregnant one came up to me and coaxed me into rubbing her belly for her while I was playing table-tennis.
40. I cannot study unless I use my own hand-written notes and unless my place is clean.
41. I started drinking coffee at 22 and a half years old and I really enjoy a cuppa in the morning.
42. I have zero interest in American politics and don’t follow it (no, never followed the elections either).
43. I have a little sister.
44. I’m pro-plastic surgery. (No, haven’t had any.)
45. I love french manicures.
46. My eye-makeup is always dramatic & I don’t like using various colors.
47. I love the smell of henna.
48. I think Ally Mcbeal would've had it better if she became a lesbian.
49. I love tea with Persian sugar (heat sugar + water + saffron and pour it into a big plate and break it into pieces when it has cooled down and solidified.)
50. I love singing and I've been told I sound like Elissa, LOL. There's a difference, obviously.
51. I overcome fear with the wish to really help people. I want to to places like Gaza and Iraq where they really need medical help.
52. I have a penchant for languages and speak Arabic, English, Hindi, Italian, Romanian and Tamil. I understand some Chinese, Malay, Spanish and French and but am less fluent (just like my Hindi & Tamil). I picked up most of the languages from watching loads of soaps and movies on TV :D

About the V Monologues

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

In a world where it is so easy to connect with one another, we still remain very much disconnected. There is a whole world of wonder out there that we cannot appreciate. Writing is my way of reaching the world. I may not literally be able to travel to every single country and talk to every single person but I do know that one place we all meet- Cyberia.

You’re probably one of those people who happened to be shocked by the almost-cliche’ title of my blog. Why the vagina? Because its not about the breasts and its not about the pee-pee. I firmly believe in the power of the coochie. No, we women not better or worse than men but we are generally more feeling-oriented. In this extremely macho world, people suppress and subsequently lose their own femininity. This blog is dedicated to the revival and encouragement of the feminine qualities of authenticity, beauty, compassion, empathy, love, service, sharing, sincerity, trust and truthfulness keeping in mind that even if a man were to function at his highest peak of intelligence, he would have to be guided by his heart- his inner-female if you will.

“The Vagina Monologues- Tales of the Hole Every Person Should Have.” is my fourth attempt at blogging. The first three blogs were merely dabbles where I didn’t commit as much effort nor energy as I would’ve liked to. I also lost my way in this little journey of mine and went off-tangent with regards to my life purpose. My sense of purpose is re-instilled, my soul is revived and this blog has been resurrected. The pen is mightier than the sword they say. I say its the keyboard. This blog is a living testimony of that.

Do enjoy your stay and be blessed.

Yours coochie-woochie-ly,

Where Do Women Pee From?

Monday, October 6, 2008

I was having a gynecological discussion with a couple of people and all of a sudden we started talking about where women pee from. I was shocked to discover that a whole bunch of morons didn't know where women pee from! Oh and dig this- many of them were women and medical students themselves!

The Vah-Jay-Jay

Alright so where does a woman pee from? No googling.
A. Clitoris
B. Urethral Opening
C. Vagina
D. Anus

Answer: B: Urethral opening.
Clitoris: An erectile tissue with no substantial physiological function besides sexual function.
Vagina: Distends to envelop the male's penis during sexal intercourse. It is the receptacle for sperm, the passage way for menstrual blood, vaginal discharge and the fetus during childbirth.
Anus: Where bodily waste is excreted from.

Eid Mubarak

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Eid Mubarak
Ps. Don't take the 'biatches' literally :P

Marriage + Relationship = IMPOSSIBLE?

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Medicine isn't something I thought that would 'happen' to me. Yet the more I thought about it, the more natural it seemed and when the opportunity came knocking at the door, I seized it with a smile that reached my ears with the utmost excitement.

I spent my time fantasizing about sitting in lecture halls, absorbing like a sponge, the knowledge that my would-be professors would impart; standing for countless hours dissecting cadavers- those remains of people who had a part to play in history whether in a small, familial setting or on a larger scale- each one of them had a story to tell, I felt. I would then hit the clinical years- interacting with patients, getting a shot at diagnosing their various illnesses, feeling that sense of satisfaction in knowing that I'm not only touching the lives of others, but I'm actually touching my own by enriching it with my life purpose- that raison d'être- the very reason for my existence. Residency would soon follow, as would marriage with my prince charming. Kids would soon follow and I'd live happily ever after!

Right.... Lets take a reality check on that one shall we?!

The moment I attended my first lecture, that big fantasy I kept replaying over and over again was rudely shattered. Medical school is no joke- its freggin serious stuff and no amount of prozac or anything else one may crave for will numb the damn pain. Yes, stress is the invisible tiger that we must tame but being pushed to exhaustion is another thing all together! I even got screamed at for having the best french manicure with painted flowers and my nails weren't even long!

Like all girls (or people- I don't want to be accused of being a sexist or anything), I had this silent (or not so!) fantasy part where I would meet my prince charming- that man who would sweep me off my feet. I planned meticulously, my elaborate wedding right down to the finest details like the kinda china we'll be eating from.

Then he came along- my own prince. Little did I know though, that he truly was one. Our courtship started after we bumped into five times on separate occasions. We met in the hospital where his nephew was a patient. I was awestruck by this 2m tall, dark, handsome man and well, he was kinda taken aback when he saw this 1.85m tall girl who was oh-so-hyper, she could make pigs fly. We got to know each other via phone conversations and outings when I could squeeze time in. Then came the engagement and along with that suddenly came the demands of his mother who *ordered* me to stop studying.

The engagement came to an abrupt end after I told her to save it for Oprah and that I wasn't going to stop studying for the world. So here I stand, wondering.. would I ever be able to do it?! Would I ever be able to nurture my children well and be there and hear them say their first words? Would I be a wonderful, supporting wife to her husband? Would I be an awesome daughter to my parents? Can I do all of the above and still be in a highly competitive specialty? The questions are endless and the worries that follow it, are worse.

Yes, men have it easier (sorry guys- I'd support y'all on a normal day but hey- unless you're going to pop triplets outta your bums, I suggest you reserve the right to remain silent!).. alot easier but its hard for them too. Would that mean though that I should end up marrying a doctor? Would it be alright to have two exhausted individuals raising a household? What if our timings clash or are the complete opposite and don't end up spending time with each other? Oh and lets not forget the fact that everything comes with a price and after graduating from medical school with alot of debt (high tuition costs), we earn minimal wages as residents despite working around-the-clock.

There's a day for pretty much everyone and everything- Mother's Day, Father's Day, Friendship Day, Rose Day, St. Valentine's Day, etc. Whatever happened to Doctor's day?! Didn't it strike anyone to start celebrating that in conjunction with the others?!

How many of you all are married and work or study? How do you find the time to balance it? How can you all bare the lack-of-sleep?! Do you just live life from day-to-day? How do you do it?! Has the infamous Nike slogan, "Just do it" become your personal motto in life? Pray tell, what's your secret?!

A Love Arranged, A Life Deranged?

"Love is blind, marriage is an eye-opener.”

Remember what it was like when we were kids? The sweets, the presents, the lame jokes and the laughs? Seems like yesterday doesn’t it? Remember how we looked up to our parents for assurance? Remember how great it was to actually satisfy our parents' wishes as we sought their approval? Will we still do the same now? Will we satisfy them when it comes to finding that life partner? Will we actually give into their belief that love comes after marriage?

I have a couple of friends who got married and have since dreaded waking up next to their arranged-husbands each day. The sex is horrible and there is absolutely no understanding whatsoever. Nada. Zilch. In fact, they aren’t even trying to understand each other anymore. They lead their own lives despite sharing the same bed. They put on a front only for the public and their kids. Their marriages were merely social and economic contracts. Our conversations are filled with bitter complaints where they do nothing else but bitch and bitch. They just wish they could reverse time and say no.

I had often wondered if I would be a victim of arranged marriage. I'd wondered if I’d get to meet my husband-to-be just thrice before getting married. I'd wondered if I would actually be able to share a bed with the man I’m bound to in paper and worse still, I'd wondered if I could stand sharing the bathroom with him! I found myself wondering if I was far too modern for arranged marriages. Could I truly love him and live happily ever after?

My parents are a prime example of how love comes after marriage. Mom had her own TV show and was pretty well-known as a dynamic debater who had never lost a competition. She was holidaying with my grandparents and when she walked into her hotel room, a little girl came running behind her, asking for her autograph. Mom was talking to the little girl when the girl’s mother rushed in after her. She saw mom and went “Oh wow! Hi! My daughter watches all your shows! Are your parents here?” My grandparents soon came into the room and that lady talked about some guy in the family who’s of marriageable age. They met a couple of weeks after that and soon got engaged. Mom got married two days before her 19th birthday and gave birth to me on her 20th. (Yes, we share the same birthday.)

If I was part of those times, I would have crossed the unmarriageable threshold at 21 and should’ve been married with at least one child. I wondered how mom could’ve actually got married at the tender age of 18. The thought just seems so far-fetched to me. I got the shock of my life when I found out grandmamma got married at 15! Both mom and grams complained of how their respective husbands refused to understand them. Yet I realized that the understanding came intuitively with time. Was it because they were in love or because they've just lived together for years?

While we, as modern women, eschew the idea of marrying without love, the idea that we’re being too picky tends to nag even more than it otherwise would. I mean is it too much to ask for a man who is well-educated, open-minded, successful and honest? Is it too much to ask for someone who has a good mix of both the East and the West? Is it too much to ask for a man who truly knows what he wants and is grounded? I feared my parents would think so.

I thought about all my 'failed' relationships- the pediatric surgical resident, the influential businessman who dined with the elite, the government official and last but not the least, the man I was engaged to, the royal Ex.

Our engagement was dismayingly abrupt and we decided to part ways. He was someone who prided himself in being modern and open-minded but who in fact had horribly crusty notions passed down from his parents. I don’t think he actually thought I would give up my education and get married to him in two months, did he? I know it was his mother’s doing but hey- I was literally going to be married to the in-laws too!

I guess I’m like every other woman, complaining that a man is either too ambitious or not ambitious enough, too eager or not eager enough. But they are picky, too. These men, in their bid to fit into Wall Street or the golf course, would like a wife who is eminently presentable to their boss, friends and family. They would like a woman to be sophisticated enough to have a martini and not a Diet Coke at an office party, but God forbid, not “sophisticated” enough to have three. Sometimes I worry that I’m a bit too sophisticated for most of our men.

Alright, so I’ll admit to needing a little romantic assistance but the question remains: Can my parents truly find The One? Can they really find the man I’ll have and from that day onward, for better or for worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and cherish 'till death do us part or will they find the diametric opposite? Will the conundrum be exacerbated by the fact that our parents had no choice for a partner; the only choice was how hard they’d work to be happy?

Well to be honest, I have no doubt they can find him. I sat down with mom and had a talk with her some time back about the entire predicament. She was shocked I even thought about such a thing! She told me that I can marry whoever I want as long as it truly feels right. She also went on, assuring me that I won’t be in a wedding I didn’t ask for, to a guy I don’t know. Mom knows me well enough and she knows exactly the kind of man I go for. If she does fix me up with someone, I’d be more than willing to meet him and get to know him over a period of time. If it feels right, I’ll go on. If it doesn’t, I’m just one step closer to the right guy.

MayaSutra: If you could meet a right man in a café, in the park, in some hotel in France or in a bookstore, you could very well meet him through your parents. Be bold enough to meet him. Who knows? He might just be the one for you! You don’t lose anything by saying “no” but gain the world by saying “yes”.

Children: Blessing or Curse?

They can be as cute as annoying, as sweet-smelling as foul, as soft as rashy, as intelligent as senseless and an asset as much as a liability. No, I’m not talking about your girlfriends. I’m talking about children.

I’ve always dreamt of being a mother to awesome kids. Though I’m not biologically capable of giving birth, I’d adopt or maybe my to-be-husband would have children from a previous marriage or something. Whatever it is, it matters not. I so want to be a mother! I decided after med school in a couple of years, I’d specialize in pediatrics and emergency medicine. Pediatrics because I love children and emergency medicine because I love thinking on my feet. I’ve always enjoyed the company of children- my niece, the kids in the neighborhood, the children in the hospital. It would therefore come as no surprise when I’d tell you I was eager to meet an Ex’s children.

After lunch at his place, he had to go to some meeting that just came up. He left me home with the kids. The boy was a smart, notorious little thing who, like all young boys loved his sister but fought with her loads. The little girl wanted me to make her up. How could I say no? Its my forte, after all!

Me:Ok.. lets make you beautiful!
Boy: Ha! Like that's going to happen.
Me: Hey.. be nice to your sister.
Boy: Why? Because we're family?
Me: Yeah and because you're father's going to be old and sick one day.. and you'll want him to live with her.

We had a great laugh, and I made us all a nice smoothie and put the remainder in the fridge- the kids could enjoy some yummy yoghurt-icecream later! He then came back and we decided to go to a funfair. Needless to say, it was just fun. The kids and I got along and it was just amazing so much so that the sibling rivalry reduced quite a bit. I knew something was up.

Me: Why are you being so nice to your sister? Who did you kill?
Him: I wonder why everyone expects the worst of me?
Me: It saves time.
Him: I just want an xbox!

I laughed my ass off. Children are always up to something, I learnt. My friend Sonto and I briefly talked about children while we were watching ‘Birth Stories’ on Reality TV.

Sonto: Argh! All that pain for these nasty, bed-wetting, fools who could potentially end up being drug addicts!
Me: Does that mean you don’t want children?
Sonto: Well, I’m not saying I don’t.. they just better not give me problems.
Me: Yeah, well, that’s bound to happen.. all the crying..
Sonto: I’ll slap them everytime they cry till they realize crying does them no good.
Me: Okayyy… and if they disobey you?
Sonto: That’s when I tell them “Listen here.. Just like I brought you into this world, I’ll take you out.”
Me: (imagining the child going right back into Sonto’s vah-jay-jay) Hahahahaha! How’re you going to take him out?
Sonto: I’ll be a practicing doctor then. I’ll take him out with an injection.

I prayed, asking the Lord to spare me. I made a mental note to never come back as Sonto’s child if I ever reincarnate!

Sonto isn’t the only one who thinks children are a problem. There are thousands of others out there who share the same view. There are people out there who want to marry but not have kids. There are people out there who don’t want to get married so they won’t have kids. There are people who just can’t see themselves having children. Well, children aren’t as bad as they seem.

I know a friend who’s in a relationship with this guy who doesn’t believe in marriage. (Okay fine, make that a few!) He doesn’t want to get married, have children, etc. His take on this (and I know there are so many people out there who believe the same) is that marriage and especially children would destroy a relationship. The time spent becomes more family/children-centered and the magic is lost. I just wonder though, if he (and the people who believe the same) ever thought about his own parents. They seem to be the envy of their friends- they kept the family together, gave their children freedom, raised ‘em well and they still have romantic evenings together. So why all this?

I think people are taking this modernization thing a bit too far- just like they do with everything else. I mean what happened to the great belief and pride we have in multi-tasking? In the past, we women would just be housewives. After the feminist movement, we would want to be mothers and work. Now, all we want to do is to just work and focus on our lingerie- so much so that we actually liken them to our intimate wear?!

“Children are like brassieres- they divide and separate.”

I think we need to keep this new-found freedom in check- just like our unchecked ambitions. In our hopes of climbing the corporate ladder, we’re missing out on quality of life. I don’t know about you, but I wouldn’t want the only proof of my existence to be my fat bank balance. Nope. No abso-fucking-lutely way!

Yeah you’d love to be with your partner forever- just the two of you and all that crap. I hate to break it to you but its going to come to an end one day. Do you know how boring it would be in time?! Damn. You may see children as the cause for the magic dying down but I think they keep it going. They give you new things to do. Everything evolves- as will our desires in time. Having children, I believe, is the next stage of the relationship- it is evolution. Where there is no growth, there aren’t any lessons. And when there aren’t any lessons, you’ve learnt and gained nothing- which literally means you’re in a stagnant state. And when you’re in that stagnant state, you’re one depressed, pathetic, lonely fool. You’re a vegetable. I mean you might as well save the plastic on your furniture for the afterlife ‘cos you’ll need something to sit on while you’re playing with your dick in hell. Its one waste of life.

Alas, children to me are blessings- even the ones I see in the roads. I treat them like mine. Screw the medicine that says you can’t have a heart-to-heart connection with patients (especially in pediatrics)- you’re as good as a zombie treating the wild. Quite honestly, you wouldn’t do your best to save someone because they’re not yours’.

I’m not saying you must have children. Neither am I saying you should want to have kids. All I’m saying is, keep your mind open- you’re bound to change and never know what the future holds- you might want children then. Be open-minded and don’t view children as irritating creatures ‘cos hon- you were irritating once upon a time (and probably still are) and so were your parents and their parents and so on. Its evolution- don’t fight it- just go through it. Its all about balance- manage your time well.

MayaSutra: No, children are NOT like brassieres- they do NOT divide and separate. They keep that flame burning brightly and take your relationship to the next level. Raise them well and they give you some satisfaction. Its all about balancing your time- which you should be doing anyway. The next time you see a child out there, smile, if not hug it. Trust me, a little love goes a long way- it only takes a spark to get a fire going.